we're all trying here

Guests are gone and I have two weeks to buckle down and get some projects done, personal, house, and work projects.  Clean up my email, write some emails, clean up my Drive, organize some photos (and there's a couple of big personal projects within that...), write a book, trim the edge, rake the yard, cut the grass, general cleaning and organizing, read some books, all in between eating/feeding, swimming, grocery shopping, FaceTiming family.

This is why I treasure my evenings and my coffee in the morning.

The relatives left today.  I brought them to the bus station.  Teoman was mad at the youngest one because she had ripped something of his.  The mother, instead of correcting the younger one, corrected Teoman directing him to put the paper away.  Twice.  So when we all packed in the car and the youngest one didn't want to sit in the back, I drew a stubborn line and said I was not driving anywhere with the youngest one squished in the front between the passenger seat and the dashboard.  The younger one cried the whole way to the bus station in between Emine abla and Gizem telling her:
"It's okay."
"Be quiet!"
"The police are going to catch you."
"Look at Tuana, she isn't crying."
"Be quiet!"
"You cry too much."
"It's okay."
It's very Turkish - and I hear a lot of people complain about how Turkish people are with their children, even Turkish people - but I have never experienced it so intensely.  It's frustrating and heartbreaking.
But I know I have a massive handful of my own heartbreaking faults.

Tuana came with us because although I have them permission for television while I was gone - Tuana is too young to separate the immediate events and she cried.  And then Tomris cried because Tuana was crying for me.  And Tomris wanted me to turn on the television... not Babanne.  

Back at home, Teoman kept throwing and shouting at his transformer that was too hard to transform.  (I mean, 30 steps is too many!).  Tomris wanted to come to the market with me - then cried because it was too hot to walk back but the stroller was filled with groceries.  And we ended the day with a swim in the ocean - which actually felt like normal - me and the kids with our own dramas.

Tolga commented over the phone that everyone seemed happy now.

umm....