clear skies

It has been in the high 90s here everyday. The late afternoons are too hot, but staying indoors or in the water is enough to keep cool. I've started walking on the beach in the mornings. Just a short jaunt, but its enough to make me hot enough to then need to swim. The water is usually glassy in the mornings. You can see clear to the bottom, even in the deeper waters. I join the old people doing their water aerobics and then return home for breakfast.

Baba has taken up whistling. He sits on the balcony and does his tuneless whistle, looking around, talking to our bird. He'll wander to the garden and work some. He just got back from wandering to the market. I say wandering because he plods along very slowly, making several stops at places where he can sit and wipe his brow with his all-purpose rag.

With all our company gone, the place is quiet as we've all entered into our retired life routines...

have patience

Tolga headed back to Ankara tonight. He'll probably come back in a few days because the job he's going to quit fired 42 people on Friday. A typical development in a company that has become more and more unstable with its decisions. The advantage of being fired is that by Turkish law, the company will have to pay Tolga a severance . . . the disadvantage is the company hasn't been very timely in its payments, including his salary. So we will wait and see what happens. In the meantime Tolga has two opportunities to choose from, one that he's informally accepted and will start in two weeks time.

I will wait for him here in Kusdasi. I'm working hard on a tan and that's about it. Tonight, before Tolga left we watched the US women's soccer match. In the middle of the match, we had guests. It was Tolga's brother and his brother's family. Today is their one-year anniversary and they brought over dessert. We had just finished eating dinner and dessert was borek (a cheese pastry), simit, and tiramisu. Dinner, tea, dessert with family is nice. With guests its boring. During a close quarter-final match, it's torturous. It's a lot of work to follow the conversations, and I have little to add with my limited Turkish. So I just sit and eat. And when we finished dessert, Anne brought out watermelon, peaches, and cherries. Baba ate everything, in spite of his diabetes.

At the end of the night, Anne was complaining about her leg hurting. Again. I had been warning Tolga about this all week. She was limping around the house. It would come and go, but she wasn't exercising at all - just toddling from the kitchen to the balcony to the living room. That's what worried me. Under no strain, she was moving like a cripple. However, when Tolga was there she made no complaints, only in passing to Yenge. Tonight she complained some more to our guests, limping dramatically to serve them food. As they finally left near midnight, she mused, "I don't know why my leg is hurting."

I think it has something to do with Tolga gone and me there.

So, like a good daughter-in-law, I made my Anne sit (with only the slightest amount of resentment) while a cleaned up for the night.

comfort in what you know

While I don't miss America, I have a list of things growing in my mind that I will do when I get there. First I plan on going to Dunkin' Donuts and eating twelve glazed donuts. Mmmmmm. Then I'll have a Subway or Quiznos sandwich. And for dinner, a good juicy steak. After dinner, a visit to Brown's Ice Cream in Stillwater for a chocolate with almonds ice cream on a sugar cone and banana strawberry malt to-go.

Tolga tries to find me things that he thinks I will miss or crave. Peanut butter. Bacon. Ginger ale.

I also have a list of things I will buy, or find in my boxes and bring back. But, really most things are replaceable. It's more about comfort I guess. What I'm used to. I'm missing what I know. So at breakfast I don't want fried French Toast with cheese. I want maple syrup. Walking along the beach, I don' t really desire "milk corn", I especially don't want it with ketchup and mayonnaise. Instead, I instantly want sweet corn with butter and salt.

In America, I was remembering the foods Tolga and I missed - we missed tea, borek, lahamacan, fresh bread, cheeses, ayran, and the Turkish breakfast. We found or made most foods after some time. I guess its the comfort we find in what we know.

to the sea

Tolga and I are on holiday in Kusdasi. We have both been relishing the time. It was about a year ago that we came on borrowed money for his brother's wedding, and now - while things seem they will always be tight financially - I'm also finding myself appreciating everything more.

We are swimming and gardening everyday. The sea is warm and clear. Our garden is dry and overgrown. We bought boogie boards in Ankara and on windy days we play in the waves, and on calm days we float and snorkel. At home, my Yenge (aka "the manager") is visiting, as well as an overweight and balding cousin. The cousin, I was informed, has psychological problems. She also married a cousin. I'm not sure which came first - but apparently she's doing well now and she is happy here.

I hadn't realized how the sea life was such a relief from the city. In Ankara we just worked and came home and mostly ran errands on the weekend. When Tolga's parents came, there was nothing for them to do but watch TV all day. But here, most of the day is spent on the balcony. Baba slowly works his way around the garden. A little bit everyday. Weeding here. Planting there. The yard is still wild looking, especially since Baba has seemingly planted every possible floral and fauna available in our yard. The community also outlawed gardens this year to conserve water. So, Baba set up a secret garden that's tucked just far enough away that no one will notice.

When we arrived, Baba pulled out a magazine he'd been holding onto to show Tolga a machine he wanted to get. Tolga's parents don't ask for much, and Tolga is happy when they do, so we went out that day to buy Baba an electric grinding stone. He's been sharpening knives and tools ever since.


Tolga's youngest brother stops by most days, and occasionally brings his 9-month pregnant wife who is hobbling around on crutches from a broken ankle. His middle brother just came home today - he was working/living in a nearby city for a new job. My favorite time is seeing the three brothers together - they are each others strong support.