Still working on a sleep routine

I'm not exactly sure where we went wrong with this routine, but Tomris is currently stripped down to her underwear and crying in her open crib.  Neither Tolga and I are sure how to do this or where to draw the line - it all feels horrible to hear your babies cry...but we've both been trying to put a better routine in place that didn't involve all of us in one bed.  I never thought I'd be that parent that sleeps in a chair or her kids' bed because the kids took over my bed ... But that's what it's come too, and with number three almost here, we are feeling it is even more urgent to break this habit.

We compromised to say weekends only can they fall asleep on my our bed, but I'm not sure, maybe this is just more confusing.  

Bedtime started with a five minute warning, but I know our routine ... Or lack of routine... Is our own fault.  We are tired.  I had a headache, so I was mostly useless.  And Tolga hasn't had to do this much on his own, so he got to experience the parent fail I feel every night he is away.  It really does take two of us to team up, or at the very least "tag out" when we hit our limits.

If we were more decisive, less asking, more immediate consequences ... And by consequences, I mean something very simple - like if they don't come, going over and taking his or her hand - maybe it wouldn't be such a tiresome cycle.  But instead Tolga asked many times for them to come and change their pajamas.  I couldn't see what was happening, but something interrupted the process and I heard everyone laughing - so Tolga's fifteen minutes of coaxing was undone by five minutes of laughter.  Which would have been fine, except Tolga was that much more spent in his energy and patience level.  He gave them their treat before bed and they fought with him over how big the candy was.  I have to remember to tell Tolga not to negotiate so much with toddlers.  Then it was:
brushing their teeth, washing hands, stop playing with the water
I-wanna-kiss everyone good night
I want to sleep with Babaanne
Where's ymca
I'm scared to sleep in my bed
My bed is too hot
I'm thirsty
I have to go potty
I want Babaanne, and so on and so on.
I sent Tolga away and sat in the chair while they continued - especially Tomris - with their delays.  I left the room to take a breath and go the bathroom, they were soon behind me (how did they get out of bed so fast?). Tomris was scared or wanted Babaanne again  - and Teoman couldn't sleep because Tomris was so noisy.  I sent them back to their beds (cause I still had to use the bathroom) and Teoman offered for Tomris to sleep on his bed with him.  I said no and went to the bathroom.  When I came back, Tomris was up in the bunk bed with Teoman.  Teoman had his arm out like Tolga and I do for them - with Tomris was laying on his arm.  It was sweet and heartbreaking at the same time - when Tomris can't find comfort, she finds it from her brother and he was her abi their - comforting her when big bad mama and baba refuse.  I felt horrible, because that was our job, but didn't say anything and sat in the chair.  However, a few minutes late, Tomris was giggling again.

This is why she's so hard to judge - dramatic freak outs one minute,  silly giggles the next.  Is it a free spirit, or a controlling one?

It ended, eventually like this...

Our night started at their buddy Mina's