family sleep

I still haven't decided on a direction for this blog.  And in lieu of thinking about a direction, I just stopped writing . . . so that didn't work.  I have been re-inspired to start again, and I want my focus to be more on the kids because I don't want to forget these times (which reminds me of all the times I didn't write because I wanted to be over and forget certain times as fast as I could).  But this will not be my sole focus, because I don't want to box myself in.  

So, I'll start here - with the kids - a lot of time has passed in light of their age and how much changes - so I am already regretting having missed the opportunity to record so many milestones and memories.  I have started work again, and with my new schedule, I feel I can be more disciplined with my time.  I am exercising with the kids crawling over me in the morning.  Going to work, leaving work AT WORK, and coming home to play with the kids, and now finding very little me time at night ... which I will use to shower or blog, but not both.

I'm finding the time now because Tolga is back home.  When he is home, he will take one child, and I will take the other.  I put Tomris to sleep, and Teoman is currently in our bed, watching me type on the chair and Tolga is sleeping.  When I catch his eye, he either smiles at me or squeezes his eyes closed (because I usually prompt him to 'close your eyes').  Tolga and I are both well aware that we could leave him to sleep by himself and that we should "sleep train" both kids, but we are not willing.  I never expected this side of me ... I miss my "me" time, but I don't want it back.

Okay, scratch all that, I do want some me time to write this blog.  I just picked Teoman up and put him in his crib, turned on the music and a low light to type while waiting for him to sleep.  He's tired, but stalling.

Tomris is falling asleep right away now, but she naps earlier and shorter than Teoman.  She is also still nursing.  I can't seem to stop nursing her -- I planned to ween her at one, but over the summer I didn't even try.  She didn't like milk nor bottles, so I had nothing to replace me with.  It someways, it's easier to nurse too - my milk doesn't turn sour in the course of hot humid Kusadasi nights.

Since I've started school, Tomris is eating and drinking everything, but when I come home, she is immediately demanding my milk.  On top of this, I think she is teething again too because she has been incredibly demanding these days: waking up millions of times at night, non-stop chattering: Mama! Double! (That's the one show we let them watch - Paw Patrol - whose theme song goes something like '...whenever you are in trouble, we'll be their on the double...')  Mama!  Mor!  (This is said with one finger pointing to the other hand's palm, and then pointing at the M&M jar on top of our dresser), Mama!  Mama! Up! Mama! Mama! Aç!  

So this shorting writing session is over - Teoman is in his crib calling "Mama, mom, mama, Baba..."