yes-no-understand?

In Turkey, the government pays for your maternity leave.  In order to file the legal paperwork, get the appropriate time off, and retrieve your pay - there are certain steps you must take.

Secret steps, apparently.

At my school, we have a human resources department - but I think it must mean something different in Turkey, or maybe it's just my school.  When the school year began, I inquired about what I would need in  order to take a maternity leave.  I was told I would be informed.  I asked again in October, November and December - but I had yet to get an answer about the procedure.

I am told this is very Turkish.  But I'm not sure I understand how so.  Can you say its cultural to be unclear, to not know the answers, to ignore questions?

I learned from a colleague that I needed a report from the hospital for permission to continue working after the 32nd week.  I retrieved the report from my doctor and turned it into the HR department this week - and this report turned out to be a problem because it wasn't from the right kind of hospital/doctor.

The mistake could cost me my maternity leave and pay, but I was told it wasn't a big deal - and why was I upset, did I have a problem with the HR department?

I often think about how communication is one of the hardest skills in one's own language, but when you're involving another language and culture too - it's hard to fathom at what point understanding has been lost.  Was it the meaning of word?  Was it the implication or gesture?  Was it the structure of the sentence?  Was it the expression, humor, or reference that was confusing?

Even when I worked in Brooklyn, I was told "You can't force your culture onto the kids."  The comment was made in response to my complaint that kids lived by the rule "you can't stay hit."  Meaning, if someone hit you, you had to hit back.  

I wonder if anyone can be clear as to what is culture, and what is communication, and what is value systems, and what is humanity?  Are they all separate?  Are they all the same?

I think if I ever need to take a course on multiculturalism again, I might challenge it's whole theory - because I'm not sure it's even possible to teach, other than to teach: in the end, you're going to have to accept that somethings you can't possibly understand because you're not me.