World's Worst Volunteer

Today was my last day at my volunteer job. I ended the commitment because, as I told the director, it was becoming a source of contention between my husband and I. That was a bit of an understatement. And, it didn't paint a full picture because it was more of source of contention for me, while my husband was my sounding board. I was stuck in the cycle of resenting the commitment but refusing to quit because I have this proud streak in me that use to have something to do with loyalty and stick-to-it-ness but has possibly been reduced to bitterness. I continued at this job while I built up a case against it: I didn't accept jobs that would make ten more dollars than the regular job because I would be late to the job I should have been making ten dollars at as well, I couldn't pursue junky jobs, couldn't visit the work force center, was having trouble making all the phone calls during business hours to deal with our apartment...

When will I ever learn to let go and be at peace.