Last week when we were on a field trip to Eymir Lake there was an incident with a biker. The road around the lake is generally for walkers and bikers, but cars are aloud as well ... and its one of the few places in Turkey where its generally understood that corners need to be taken with caution because the winding road leaves lots of blind spots. Bike racers can be almost as dangerous as cars, but there not too many of them.
Either way, when I biker came barreling down the road, tooting his horn, we hollered at the kids to stay to the side for the umpteenth time.
They didn't move nearly fast enough and the biker had stop. He was wearing sun glasses, a biker hat, shirt, shorts and shoes. He almost looked serious except that he had a gut and it was strange that he was biking around the lake in the middle of the day in the middle of the week.
The biker was angry and my friend Meltem was the closest. She was the perfect person to be there. She is 47 yrs old, retired, and almost everyone likes her. I'm not exactly sure how she does it, but I know it has something to do with the words she chooses and the cultural inflections behind them. I watched the exchange from the distance. I heard her respond to him, and the man answered back, she responded, he answered back. At this point, I saw the kids become disgusted with the man and things got very uncomfortable. Meltem responded again, more at length, and I saw the man's posture change from angry and aggressive to accepting. Whatever she said, worked.
I asked her today what had happened in the exchange. She had apologized to the man, and when he continued to shout, she answered calmly - these are children and the need some time to follow directions. We were actually moving them, but think of it as if they were your children and you can understand that they cannot move like you and I. The man did have a child (thankfully) and he calmed down.
My friend had gently corrected the man without humiliating him.
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