I have mentioned this before, but I will mention it again here, and again later because this is such an ingrained belief. In Turkey, cold weather is the cause of: the common cold, the flu, fevers, neck pain, back pain, stomach aches, muscle aches, any kind of ache or pain, infertility, hemorrhoids, and it is probably the root cause of cancer, polio, and heart attacks. It doesn't matter that it's sunny and between 80-100 degrees every single day in the summer. A slight breeze, walking on a cold floor, drinking cold water ... all are dangerous exposures to cold and direct pathways to sickness.
So why isn't Norway sick, or Minnesota for that matter? I grew up swimming when it was 65 degrees out - my lips were purple during my swimming lessons. Always. Educated people. People who've lived abroad. The belief is unshakeable. I cannot disprove it - because, indeed, my children run around sweaty (thus "cold"), they run in the house barefoot (thus "cold feet"), the sit down on the ground, they swim, I use an air conditioner ... I'm afraid that I may be the worst mother in the world. It's as if I'm purposely getting my children sick. If anything, I've only proven this belief to all of my neighbors and relatives with Tomris's latest hospitalization.
There is no use in fighting this belief. I've tried - with what I've come to understand is simply my common sense, and nobody else's. To a Turkish person, avoiding the cold is their common sense. Neck pain or sore throat? Put on a scarf. Stomach ache? Put on a sweater.
So sometimes, I submit and put shoes on my kids. And sometimes I rebel and put extra ice cubes in my drink.
Nazar (the evil eye) is another very deeply ingrained belief. It's the belief that when you have something good, others become jealous and want what you have ... and in effect, they curse you with their coveting. It is customary to place the nazar boncuğu (evil eye bead) on your door step, key ring, pin it to your children's clothing, etc. This (unlike the name implies) is worn or displayed to deflect these evil thoughts.
My parents, sister, and even myself for a time were all a bit offended by this idea at first. From our culture, and more specifically our religion - it was wrong to put such emphasis on charms and evil when Jesus has set us free from these things. To an extent, I still hate it when something bad happens and Anne mutters nazar, because in a way it seems to be giving evil credit and even power over our lives. I don't doubt their are evil spirits are at work in the world, but surely it is much healthier to focus on the good rather than dwelling on the influence of nazar.
I was really thrown when our old aunt from Istanbul came and burnt a special incense that was to cleanse the house of nazar. But, as I've learned many things so slowly here - this is part of their culture. It is deeply rooted and all they know. Their intentions are good - to cleanse our homes of evil, so that we may have health and happiness. How can we fault that?
While the incense burning is an extreme example, there are milder beliefs in cures as well. If Anne suggests one more time that "if only Tomris would drink the lemon mint tea her vomiting would go right away" I might explode. Magic medicines.
Medicines may or may not help, and I've never expected them to. I've always known the body just takes time to fight off sicknesses. Sometimes with the help of medicines. Pain relievers sometimes help. Narcotics hardly do a thing. Maybe I'll give aspirin, ibuprofen, and ice as my top three magic medicines - if I were to have any.
That is not the case here. Medicine is the solution for everything. When I hurt my back last year, I went to the school doctor. They put some cream on my back and then asked, "Is it all better?" I went to a "real" doctor the next day and he sprayed my back with something that freezes the surface muscles. "This will help you right away," he said. He wanted me to test its effect by bending over. I told him I didn't think that was a good idea, and I wondered about his doctoring skills. So, when that didn't work, they wanted to do injections in my back. A procedure that is done awake in America, but the knock you out in Turkey for it ... because they love medicines! Both of my labor and deliveries I suspect I was overmedicated because I was vomiting and fainting several hours after birth.
Baba is the worse (and maybe the most dangerous) about medicines. He takes a vitamin C and claims he is better within five minutes. He showed me a medicine that seemed to be cure-all for his general malaise. It was a nasal decongestant. When I'm sick, or my children - usually the first thing people ask me is: are you taking in medicine? And if my answer is yes, there is no further discussion - because the medicine will cure whatever is ailing me or my children. If my answer is no, I'll be offered a sure fix medicine. The first time someone did this to me, I was so touched. How sweet, and how great -- I should have been suspicious when she said she gave this medicine to her child for everything and it didn't bother their stomach or what not. When I looked it up later, I realized it was the equivalent to Tylenol. Acetemetophine has never been a cure-all for me.
And then there's serum. As in 1950s when you went to the hospital and got serum. It took me a while to figure out it's just IV fluids, and in different cases, maybe a booster of vitamins, or what not. When my friends or family are sick here, I was always trying to get the details - what was it, what did they do, what did they give you - because going to the hospital was pretty dramatic for me to hear. And without fail, answers usually involve going to the hospital and getting serum. Six weeks pregnant friend was in the hospital for five days for serum. My sister-in-law, when she was pregnant, was in the hospital for three days for serum. Baba got serum. Tomris got serum. I mean - this must be some magic cure-all stuff, right? I want serum. When I've gone to the hospital, I expected serum. Everyone else is getting it. Last summer, I was so sick, I desperately wanted them to keep me so I could nap for a few hours, but no - just medicines, a blood test, and the boot. Last month, I went in for a migraine ... not something I would normally do - but I couldn't take my magic medicine (ibuprofen) because I was continually throwing up. I thought with the danger of dehydration and being pregnant - surely that would win me some magic serum. But nope, just two shots in the ass and directions to not drink cold water.
I didn't tell them I usually snuggle in bed with some ice packs on my shoulders.
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